Author: Tara Kompare
Publisher/Price: Da Capo Press [$15]
Perfect
For: your friend with the new, colicky fuss monster, who doesn't have time to find it for herself.
When
I prepared for the birth of my first child, I skipped all of the
chapters in the books that dealt with colic. It was scary to me, the
possibility that my baby would suffer from something that sounded so
awful, so impossible to face as a new mom. So I assured myself I
wouldn't have to face it; my baby would not be the "one" of the one in
five
infants who suffers from this unexplained, inconsolable screaming. But then he was,
and it turned my world upside-down. I wish that back then someone could
have handed me a copy of The Colic Chronicles, A Mother's Guide to Calming Your Baby While Keeping Your Cool, by Tara Kompare, pharmacist and columnist. Living with a colicky baby is one of those things that really can't be
explained to someone who has never been through it, and doesn't need to
be explained to someone who has. It was clear to me from the start that
Kompare had lived through it and survived, and memories of those days
of colic came rushing back to me as I read.
Like many other books
about colic, this one provides an overview of ways to try and soothe
your crying baby (babywearing, white noise, swaddling, etc.), but what
I truly appreciate about The Colic Chronicles is the emphasis placed on helping the mom
of the colicky baby to survive and cope. While some of the suggestions
may seem simplistic to someone who has not lived through this, I know
that I would have welcomed them in the throes of it all. The section
entitled "Mommy Survival 101: How To Take Care of You" focuses on
practical ways to make sure those bare necessities happen, such as
making sure you are fed. This chapter alone demonstrates Kompare's
unique understanding of how difficult the colic time can really be, as
she lays the groundwork for a simple shopping list that includes foods
that can be eaten with one hand (because all meals will be eaten with
one hand as the other will obviously be bouncing a screaming infant),
microwavable meals (because you can't expect to cook anything on a
stove as you will almost certainly be pulled away to tend to some
screaming, setting off the fire alarm - I learned this the hard way),
and the reminder that there is a such thing as a slow cooker (which, I
swear, I did not remember at all during our colic days).
As a mom who had to face the colic monster, I appreciate that someone has recognized the importance of putting a book like this together so that everything one needs is all in this one resource, because a mom of a colicky baby certainly doesn't have time to be sorting through multiple websites, articles, and books. In addition to the practical tips for basic survival, what I think is really special about this book is that Kompare, with great empathy, gives the moms of colicky babies permission: permission to eat from paper plates for a few weeks, permission to go into a room and scream, permission to eat a piece of chocolate in peace in an attempt to gain an ounce of control over one tiny element in their lives.
In the section entitled "The Others - How to Handle Everyone Else" Kompare gives us permission to let our husbands fend for themselves a bit during this trying time and to do so guilt-free. She even includes some lighthearted "Colic Vows" for husbands and wives to promise to each other, as well as a "Colic Countdown Calendar" to serve as a constant and fun reminder that the end is in sight. And while most of the book takes on a light tone and has a sense of humor about it all (because you have to either laugh or cry), in the final section, "Where to Turn When You're On The Edge," Kompare gets quite serious, pointing out the strong relationship between colic and shaken baby syndrome, describing common symptoms of and her own experience with postpartum depression, and offering advice and resources to moms for when they are in the darkest of times.
If nothing else, this book proves what so many others have tried to tell these poor mothers: that you are not alone, that this period will end, and, most importantly, that you will emerge on the other side of colic alive and strong. While there is no known cure for colic, and while no book or anything else can make the crying completely go away, The Colic Chronicles can save your sanity for the temporary time (and it is temporary, it really is) that you must deal with it. It's safe to say that the mom of a colicky baby doesn't have time to read this review, so if you have a friend who is going through it, get her a copy. Go on over to her house and give her the book; let her know she is not alone. Then offer to hold the baby while she reads it, has a shower, and eats a bowl of cereal in peace. You have no idea how grateful she will be for this simple, amazing gift
-Beth
